Today I had two parties I was invited to.
- From a dear friend and her fun husband, in the morning.
- From a bro type who is celebrating his wife, in the evening.
I went to the morning one, but was incredibly tired and warm so I slept. When I went to get up for the second party I was out of gas entirely. It was that feeling when you are dragging your body out of the grave it seems and your mind is swimming through a fog.
As I wrestled with going, my Beloved asked me a question:
Will you honor your feelings or the feelings of your friends?
I have always put the feelings of my friends ahead of my own. Even as I…let a lot happen that shouldn’t, big or small.
My Beloved has been showing me my feelongs and how different they are from my logical thoughts, how many social laws are in place to care for others and don’t even include me.
So today I had the express privelage of my first real assignment. Will I honor my feelings or honor others feelings? Will I honor this voice inside of myself who is constantly checking with God or my friends voice who are living their life as their own and not necessarily including my needs or wants in theirs?