‘Monogom-ish’ Wth?

A relationship that is mostly monogamous but occasionally exceptions are made for sexual play. 

– urban dictionary

….this is not polyamory by the way. This is two people in a set relationship that get to sexually enjoy other people, as long as it is just sexual.

…I have so many feeling about this.

There’s a ted conference online with this title that I thought was talking about something else, but then it became this and I was left with feelings.

Not even questions, just a ton of feelings. 

The speaker spent a good portion on her talk saying how monogamy is failing and how bad it is and…I got the same feeling as when the people around me, tv and associates begin to complain about marriage or kids. There is a level of disrespect that flavors the whole conversation toward their supposed loved ones. I understand unloading or letting off steam…but that’s like being naked, not everyone wants to see that and why would you want to?

I wanted to know why the ‘great fix’ this person came up with was only to let sex be given to anyone, but the emotional aspects stay with just one. 

…I don’t know anyone who has done that successfully, and I know people who have tried. Male of female, everything gets twisted.

The speaker didn’t talk about the tons of women I know who don’t enjoy sex because they aren’t taught how to enjoy their bodies but only how to please their mate. The speaker didn’t talk about the tons of men who are only taught to satisfy themselves sexually and not their mate and thus leave them feeling unsatisfied.

Yeah he may be able to mow the lawn and bring his partner special gifts or do great romantic gestures…but pleasing their partner sexually? No one I know of talks anywhere near that. When I ask they are noncommital or unenthusiastic, and not in that sly, I have a secret kind of way.

If people aren’t satisfied sexually the point isn’t to introduce new players into the game…it’s to learn how to play the game you have succesfully! 

Oh and have a happy april!