Adjustments

I have a ‘passport’ that holds a lot of the things that I hope to do like writing a book and eating chapuline tacos. I looked at it again this week and found something interesting. I had written that I wanted to continue my year long blog. I was astounded since I had written this over 2 years ago and was happy to see that I was on the right path without even thinking about it.

I pulled out the packet of ideas that had titles of the things I wanted to talk discuss. There are so many things I believe in and I want to say them now. I have been silent since I had neither the inclination, energy or fight to battle through all my old programming to do it.

Since I found it though I will be adding them to THIs blog. I will be looking at ideas and talking about the set mindset within cultures, religion, the world at large and then my own personal feelings…or maybe I will just have my own, we all know what everyone else thinks. It is true that I write here so that one day someone who walks my same road can see what I did to grow but this is still for my own mental/emotional health and growth.

The point is I want to begin to formulate my own ideals into words.

I’m kind of …not at ease. Before when I have spoken my true opinions that have been shamed, pushed or questioned out of me.

I can be a rock in some areas but if you ask me my personal stand on things like rape or abortion or depression, I will tell you how everyone else feels about it. As if I am trying to give the person options, which, there is a time for doing that.

But I don’t know MY thoughts. I know they are not like other people’s…but I don’t really know my own in terms of words, only feelings.

I look forward to the journey, but I wish to keep it to myself for awhile from those I know. Maybe one day I will print this year into a book and give it my friends and family, but by then I will be a lot stronger and when they see it, I know I won’t have a ‘Peyton Place’ on my hands.

P.S. Don’t see that movie if you haven’t, it is just a horrible plot, those people were NOT good people. Like ‘A Streetcar Named Desire’? Really abhor that story!

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