A family friend asked me what I was doing with my time lately. Abhor those questions. Might as well ask me the meaning of life (42) and I’d have a better answer.
Yet I told him I was writing, even though they are meager beginnings. He then suggested I write reviews on the books I have read. As I have not found my voice I questioned him on such a path. He then advised that starting a journey can help you to find your voice in a way that staying home never could.
So here I am, writing about manga, books and movies. If only I could review humans! I love them so much that it would be wonderful to sit and simply review them. 4 stars for Kipp! Hahaha. What an interesting life turn that would make. Facebook is kind of like that but we embellish on there so much that I’m not quite sure that would be helpful. I think of those who would write about me, what would they say? I know that it would be mostly positive… but it wouldn’t be the fullness of who I am. Sure it would sound nice.
I wanted this post to be a little less bitter sounding, so I will change my tone.
I just wanted to make a note of the moment that may change me, that has changed me already. In the few days that I have started to write again I have found a level of clarity about a few things that were at sea to me. I feel a rush of wind in my lungs as I yell out at the sea of the internet. Though I do not think I am heard it is still the sweetest serenity that engulfs me. Some have a piano or guitar, my words are enough for me.
The words that are harsh to my soul but are like a fire coming out of me are soothed by the break of a review. One day I will thank him but to thank him would be to show my hand of doing this at all and I’m not prepared for this. This post is a reminder that one day I will thank him. It is not an explanation of what I am doing, for I believe one of my rules was against that.
I wonder though if this will be enough, will my words be enough of a thanks to those who have cared for me and shown me new paths. We shall see. ^^