AV: Ask Amanda

This woman is amazing. She talks about the use of simply asking people for things. What is interesting is that a few days after I watched this my mother brought up the topic of fairness and I was able to relate the idea very simply to this TedxTalks. I love it!

PS she happens to remind me A LOT of an artist friend of mine who is outgoing and if I had to say someone I looked up to it would be her. Not saying who cause she would hate it and then not believe it.



My heart breaks on holidays a little. When I look at my room, and my home and my loved ones…I am thankful.

But there is also my family who have been hurt and so because of this they choose to shut my family out. I get it….I might have too. Yet when I see just a small fraction of what it is like not to be connected to family that you love and want to connect with I think about those who have been kicked out of their homes and away from their families. I can’t really fix the hurt but I do have hugs for my own loved ones who I know are hurting and for those who just need to talk. It’s why I have been a listener for so many years. I can let myself be smaller for a little while if it means that you can have someone you trust to listen and be your shoulder and cry with you. This is why I have been silent for so long. It’s just time to grow up a little more is all or at least find a way so that we are both taken care of.

I want to say that I am thankful for so many things, my Baba, my parents, my FOL, bros and sisters and this whole family we have created and adventure and fun and writing and love, oh wait I already said that last one. 🙂 I am truly humbled by all of these parts that make up who I am. I am thankful that I am who I am and THE I Am is control and I am his dependent because I could do nothing with out m Baba and he makes it all so much funner.

Delay the real world

What a strange idea, no matter what you are doing you are in the ‘real’ world and yet I am still fascinated by this book.

Truth is that I love travel and want to plan an around the world trip soon. So I got a book (First Time Around the World by Doug Lansky) and it reminded me that if I do anything I need to be doing things I like since there are so many opportunities to do so. This pushed me to look at a few others and I landed on this book: Delaying the Real World by Colleen Kinder.

She starts with some great ’10 commandments’ since we all like a few rules to get us going. ^^ She then has examples and I have already placed a hold for it at my library since I need more ideas and reminders of what I am passionate about since they are parked so deep within me.

So far I have found several documents to find scholarships as well as articles to get me started. (So that’s how people insert other sites!! How secretly fun)

Amazingly I am already finding things that are interesting but not the usual ideas. Ex: Party Planner in Vegas. I have a small-med crush on Vegas and have been trying to go for years to just look around and see all they have to offer. I also have family and people who have invited me enjoy their church services. What an opportunity if I were able to do all of it by staying Vegas working for some hotel for awhile. The best of a bunch of my separate worlds. 🙂 Maybe I can get a bunch of these planned and then connect them to my around the world ticket. ^^

Where are you going?

Where are you going?

It’s time for me to start asking this question.

If you are going to Paris for the weekend and I am going to Korea for a month with weekend trips to Tokyo than why would we board the same plane?

Life is a lot the same. People want to put a lot of input into your life and they aren’t believing in the same things as you, they aren’t doing what you will ever do and yet they say you are wrong in what you are doing because they are thinking of themselves.

Who gets this?? When people laugh and mock me for things I do and how I think I remind myself that they don’t live in this body, I do.  Recently my friend and I had an argument about how spicy some food was. No it’s not spicy, it’s spicy to me, it’s not spicy. Back and forth until finally I said ‘It is spicy to me and I am the only one who lives in here.’ and then I didn’t comment when she brought it up. It was hard not too, and when my little brother also looked at me incredulously I wanted to bend but I thought, if I can win this tiny little argument then later maybe I can win a battle or two and then later maybe I can win a war. My boss told me to do something that usually I would say yes to without thinking but I grew a bit uncomfortable and this time I honored that discomfort and said no. It was tiny and he mocked me and a friend of mine had to do it which made it worse but I didn’t back down because I wanted to say no. And finally I won another small little battle but one a little larger than the first.^^ AND no broken relationships because of it.

Leaves vs Apples

For me this year has been all about rest and many of the people I know don’t get this.
I have done this before and I was considered a freeloader by many even when unspoken.
Yet in this time I found something wonderful:
– I was building leaves!

If anyone has seen any kind of plant they know there are leaves and fruit, branches and roots and the main ‘trunk’. However the leaves and roots are the most important to the tree and the fruit is most important to those who enjoy the tree. I’m not telling you anything you don’t know. However, if people were to do what they most often do but as a tree and focus only on producing the fruit so others could be happy…they would die. The leaves and roots are the only way the tree can live and yet most people only focus on the fruit or roots that are already grown and are there more to show you where you personally are coming from as opposed to anyone else in the world with their beliefs or heritage.

The leaves are your number one asset and trees have more of them most of the time than the fruit. How interesting.

For any Christians reading this: John 15: 1-17 talks about Jesus being the vine or the ‘trunk’ and people being the branches or extensions of himself. Check your fruit is what is always mentioned however, of course he didn’t have to say check your leaves, they are just a natural part of life. But in our fast paced life filled with distraction and go-get-em-American-non-stop-momentum…how many of us are dying and simply not living?

PT: Addiction

I am addicted to Tv, to stories of any kind really but videos really hold me.

My life is so boring most of the time. I didn’t think about this until I began to see how much I watch television or just a video, or how many books I have read even though there are people. Sometimes, not always, but sometimes my reading has become escapism or even better a shot in the arm. A mechanism to help myself to stay alive. I have been trying to stop watching as much and failing. It was after a self examination of several other things in my life that I found something.

Many times I a find myself in conversations with very interesting people and they are talking about wonderful things and I have the vaguest impression of boredom and inanity. It has been there so long I had always missed that and yet the more I read about self I learn that I as an individual have to listen to the smaller noises inside of myself in order to fix myself.

Ex: hunger indicates need for nourishment. Let that time go past and the indicator goes away even though the need is still there. Sometimes shaking of the external limbs occurs and a few other science-y things that I can’t see nor explain well. Leave it long enough and your hair can change color, even longer and ya die.

I have ignored the fact that within my life I do not enjoy or dig into the things that fill me. I do not bring them to the table of relationships because I have learned not to. I do not do a lot of things.

I am finding more and more people who enjoy what I enjoy and yet I would never have found them if I hadn’t brought it up in conversation. I have been so willing to produce fruit for others and in turn have forsaken my own leaves and thus nourishment.

This is my personal: I like Doctor who and stories and sci-fi and technology but I like them really because of the hope they provide for more than what is around me, they have travel and pioneering legends that I doubt I will ever enjoy (unless science takes us really far in the next 10 years) they do things that inspire my soul and I dream about. But I speak THAT language when I am involved with others and they don’t know that language and so become uninterested and bored…so I gave up. I didn’t think to explain the whys since I didn’t think about them until recently.

This is a great cartoon from Zenpencils that I hope will intrigue you called, You aren’t like them.

Doctor who!

For those who are not into sci-fi or Brit TV, this is an amazing show. It’s called Dr Who and it is about an alien who flies through Time and space looking for fun. It is way more complicated than that but which show isn’t?

I’m putting this on earlier so that I won’t forget to write because I am going to be waiting for this show to come on. Need cable but no one uses that any more really. 😦

Reason I am posting this at all? Doctor who is a reminder that everything is brilliant and anything is possible if you are looking and waiting for it. Hope.^^

So, love and joy and buh bye!

AV Day: Millennials

So I am including a time for just videos.

Since I have been finding videos that are incredibly helpful to me or speak to me. Either way, fun times ahead.

After watching this it was wonderful. The woman talks about people who are called Generation Yers or Millennials and how to deal with them. She herself is probably in the baby boomers but has an astute way of looking at things. Instead of just forcing a camel through a needle, she says to make a new needle. Look at the people instead of looking at ‘THOSE people or kids’.

Radio Rebel

I’m not the high school person, not even in high school and my school didn’t really have labels and everyone hung out but, this movie is still amazing. The idea of speaking your voice even if you are beyond freaked out to move. I have never been the person who speaks out unless I am totally boiling or done or whatever other cooking term is out there. To have even this blog is not a huge step but a major step. I shake in my boots at times thinking about the fact that my thoughts are out here and in a way I sometimes hope no one will ever find this blog and then someone does and I am at a lost for what to do. 🙂 I’m glad I’m flying though.

Here is a video and the movie on Hulu if you wish to watch. http://www.hulu.com/watch/427561


Be not afraid

Today I stayed home and stewed but that allowed me time to focus and gain energy. I have loads of fabric scattered throughout my room and many times I am afraid of the fabric. I am not Karl Lagerfeld or Eymerich Francois. I am Ariel and I don’t create the same way and many time it is FRUSTRATING because I think how the heck am I supposed to be one of the greats or even make clothes when everything I make looks cheap and unsophisticated…..

Today I found hope.

I found out that I have my own style, I have my own way of making things!!! I like taking patterns and such and making amazing things but that isn’t my way. Art isn’t really math and formulas though it can be and I have been approaching things this way instead of my way. If it is art than it doesn’t matter how I make it as long as I do and do it my way. When I do I’m not only happy about how it turned out, super amazing, but it’s also something I am proud of because I did it my way….to quote Frank Sinatra. 🙂